BREAKING: Wrexham AFC Striker Benched After Bizarre Parrot-Related Injury, Ruled Out of Upcoming Match
In a plot twist that sounds more like the setup to a particularly outlandish sitcom episode than real life, Wrexham AFC’s star striker, Callum “Cal” Hargreaves, has been ruled out of Saturday’s crucial National League match following a freak injury involving, of all things, a parrot named Captain Beaky.
The news broke early this morning when Wrexham manager Phil Parkinson appeared at the club’s training ground press conference looking both bewildered and slightly amused. Clutching a steaming mug and a stack of hastily prepared notes, he cleared his throat before delivering the update that immediately lit social media on fire.
“It’s not a typical injury,” Parkinson began. “Cal will be out for a week or two. The incident involved…a parrot. A very vocal parrot. I’ll leave it at that.”
Naturally, reporters did not leave it at that.
Within an hour, details began to emerge from team insiders and nosy neighbors. According to multiple sources, the incident occurred on Tuesday evening at a local animal sanctuary where Hargreaves had volunteered to help promote a charity fundraiser. The striker, known for his love of animals and his admittedly dramatic flair, had been filming a promotional video when disaster struck.
An eyewitness, sanctuary employee Janine Holt, offered a firsthand account: “Cal was brilliant with the animals. He was bottle-feeding lambs and even tried his hand at mucking out the pig pen—laughing the whole time. But then he asked to meet Captain Beaky.”
Captain Beaky, a rescued blue-and-yellow macaw with a reputation for being “a bit of a diva,” had not taken kindly to Hargreaves’ enthusiastic approach. “He was squawking a bit at first,” Holt explained, “but then Cal got close, probably a bit too close, and Beaky just…launched. Landed right on his shoulder like a pirate’s parrot, then leaned down and bit him. Hard.”
Sources confirm the bite itself was to Hargreaves’ left ear, but it wasn’t the parrot’s beak that caused the real damage. In the chaos that followed—squawking, flapping wings, and Hargreaves trying to duck—he stumbled backward over a hay bale, twisting his knee in the process.
The striker was taken to a nearby urgent care facility where he was treated for what’s being described as a “moderate sprain with swelling.” A club physician later confirmed that while there was no ligament damage, Hargreaves would need to rest for at least 7–10 days.
For a team riding the momentum of a five-match unbeaten streak, the timing couldn’t be worse. Saturday’s match against Barnet is seen as a pivotal one in Wrexham’s promotion push. Hargreaves, with seven goals in the last eight games, has been a driving force in the attack.
When reached for comment, Hargreaves himself posted a short video on Instagram, sitting on his couch with his leg elevated and a bandaged ear, sipping tea from a mug that read “Birds Aren’t Real.”
In the video, he joked: “You’ve heard of being benched for hamstring pulls, red cards, maybe even food poisoning. But a parrot? That’s new. To be fair, Beaky’s got a wicked left jab. Or beak. Whatever. I’ll be back soon, hopefully with fewer feathers involved.”
Captain Beaky, meanwhile, remains in fine form, reportedly strutting around his aviary like a feathered king, having unknowingly taken down one of Wrexham’s top talents.
Online reactions have ranged from sympathy to sheer disbelief. Twitter exploded with hashtags like #BeakyGate, #ParrotPunch, and #CaptainBeakyStrikesAgain. One user commented, “Only Wrexham could lose a striker to a parrot. This club is living in a sitcom.” Another fan posted a mock movie poster titled The Beakening, featuring a dramatic Hargreaves staring down an enormous CGI parrot.
Even Hollywood co-owners Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney couldn’t resist. Reynolds tweeted: “If you wrote this in a script, people would say it’s too far-fetched. But here we are. Heal up, Cal. And someone get Beaky an agent.”
McElhenney followed with: “All I’m saying is if we don’t use this in Season 3 of Welcome to Wrexham, we’re missing an open goal.”
Back at the club, Parkinson confirmed that backup striker Liam Osbourne would start in Hargreaves’ place. “Liam’s got a point to prove,” Parkinson said. “We’ve got depth. Just…no birds in the dressing room, please.”
Hargreaves’ absence is undoubtedly a blow to the team, but fans remain hopeful. “We’ve been through worse,” said longtime supporter Alan Bryson outside the Racecourse Ground. “Remember the goat incident of ’04? We bounced back then, we’ll bounce back now.”
When pressed about the goat incident, Bryson simply shook his head and muttered, “Don’t ask.”
For now, Wrexham AFC will take to the pitch this weekend with one less striker and one more absurd chapter in what is quickly becoming one of football’s most colorful narratives.
As for Captain Beaky, the sanctuary has reportedly issued a tongue-in-cheek statement declaring him “unavailable for interviews at this time,” and assuring the public that he will not be attending any more football-related events.
Whether a new talisman or an accidental saboteur, Beaky has secured his place in Wrexham lore—beak, bite, and all.
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